Dismal Day

...weather-wise.

I had a pleasant weekend. Didn't do anything Friday night. So the nephews spent the night and William wanted to dance to the Wiggles' Yummy Yummy VHS. SO we did. Ben played with his cars on the kitchen floor while William and I pointed our fingers and did the Twist. We also did some Pirate dancing with Captain Feathersword. It was fun. I made pancakes for breakfast and had them home by 8:30 am, Sat.

The workshop was cool. Made some new friends who have a troupe in Fayetteville. I have an open invitation to come to their practice sessions and dance with them. This group's taken the Belly Dancing a bit further than the people I dance with here in town. This group incorps an "I am a Goddess" theory into the dance, which is fine if you need constant reminding. I don't. I know I'm a Goddess.

After the workshop, I called Seth and we met at Applebee's for an early dinner. I wore a multi-brown colored sarong skirt and a brown tank with a brown fishnet top over it. Put my hair up and had on a lot of jingly jewelry. I completed the outfit with ankle tie brown sandals. Seth couldn't take his eyes off me.

Once dinner was over, I followed Seth to his place. There was a small crowd there... his roommates had some girls over and were grilling out. Seth introduced me and I was pleased to see that they were as friendly as he said they would be. I ended up in the house with the 'book-worm' looking roommate. His name is Donald. A nice guy and a reader of Stephen King, Koonz and some other authors I like. We talked about books and I mentioned poetry... he's read in that field and we discussed that as well. Seth overheard the conversation and mentioned I was a poet, which lead to a discussion on publishing, etc.

I might have appeared engross in the conversation but I kept an eye on Seth. Once he introduced me to everyone and got me settled in the house with a glass of wine, he mingled with the others. I noticed his focus was on a few youngish looking girls (I guess they were around 22 or so). Seth didn't ignore me, in fact he came over often to talk for a few moments. Donald finally noticed me looking at Seth and his antics that made the girls giggle. I guess he thought he should reassure me, so he said, "Don't mind them. Seth's getting validation. You know he was a fat kid once? He didn't buff up until he was in the army."

Ahhh.... bells went off. No wonder he chased me down... I didn't validate him upon our first introduction. This didn't bother me, as much as it would have a few years ago. We all need validation, some people need it for life. I watched Seth in a scientific way, noting his body language, and the responses of the girls he charmed...if he got what he wanted, he moved on to another...and if he didn't he worked them harder, until they gave him what he needed. A few times he noticed me, watching and made an effort to make the girls laugh hard. I assume he thought I was jealous. I wasn't. But I let him make his own assumption, filling whatever need he had.

As I've said before, I'm keeping things at arms length but still enjoying what we have--which is hot sex and laughter. Believe me, he gets validation. Just as I get it from him.

Viewing Seth's need didn't make me lose respect for him nor did it send me tail-spinning into self-doubt city. I viewd it as a piece of the Seth puzzle, one I fit into place.

After a while, the girls found other guys to talk too and Donald wondered off. Seth and I went to his room for a while. He apologized for mingling for so long, saying 'the girls like to talk to me and I didn't want to hurt their feelings.' I smiled and said it was ok. And I meant it. I stayed for breakfast... I woke up with a hunger that didn't include pancakes. ;)

Got home early Sunday. Took a shower and a nap. Spent the day doing laundry, editing Sam's poetry for his first book for PA, spent some time chatting with Jo and... watched a couple of movies.

It was a really great weekend.