Tz is out of the hospital. He got home yesterday. We talked for a while at around 5 pm and he said that our intimacy won't go on...aka sex, because he's afraid he'll have a heart attack...at least until he has his valve surgery and who knows when that will be.
I noticed a withdrawal from him in ways... I guess he's protecting himself by putting a blanket between us. My heart aches so much. Since I'm writing 'our' story all the intensity of us is still so fresh and vivid. I can't write on it right now..and I need to if I am going to finish it by Nov 30. But the memories I'm reliving are so strong and so happy. But my heart isn't.
There is a hole in my soul.
I can't even finish writing the blog post...