Kids and the things they say...
Category: Life
My nephews are never boring. This week (and it's only half finished) I've learned a few things from them, mainly my little bird--Ben.
1) The meaning of Gay as told by Ben 6 soon to be 7 in a few days:
When a boy touches another boy's butt or bladder, he's gay. When a girl touches another girl's bladder she's gay. When a boy touches a girl's bladder, they aren't gay.
2) Ben's BoogerMan (Boogey Man) Theory:
He's got claws and hoofs and lives in the ground where it's hot. You have to dig through China to get to him. When you see him, you'll know he's the BoogerMan because he'll be covered with boogers and slime.
3) Ben explains how to defend myself from the Burger King Burger King guy:
Sherrie, when the Burger King Man peeps in your window or tries to get you to eat lettuce or sumpthin.... you... KICK HIM IN THE NUTS. He'll fall down on the ground like this (falls down) and groan like this (Groans like a ghost) and holds onto his bladder.
Showing posts with label things kids say. Show all posts
Showing posts with label things kids say. Show all posts
Wednesday, September 10, 2008
Thursday, July 24, 2008
William
He spent last night with me...and is staying with my brother today.
I was really tired when I got home but it's hard to say no to him, so he ended up at my house. We watched some Icarly and then he hit the PC to play some games. He has a huge book to read so I made him get off the PC and..it was such a struggle. He kept defying me.
(We play this game when either or both boys disagrees with me to the point of driving me crazy. I ask, "Who am I?" Their stock answer is 'the adult.' Then I say, "Who are you?" Their answer is "the child."
But ole Will threw a monkey wrench into the mix. I said, "William, who am I?"
He didn't blink an eye, and answered "You."
I was really tired when I got home but it's hard to say no to him, so he ended up at my house. We watched some Icarly and then he hit the PC to play some games. He has a huge book to read so I made him get off the PC and..it was such a struggle. He kept defying me.
(We play this game when either or both boys disagrees with me to the point of driving me crazy. I ask, "Who am I?" Their stock answer is 'the adult.' Then I say, "Who are you?" Their answer is "the child."
But ole Will threw a monkey wrench into the mix. I said, "William, who am I?"
He didn't blink an eye, and answered "You."
Thursday, May 08, 2008
Schoolyard Politics
The nephews are enrolled in the afterschool program at the daycare where Mom and Lisa work. A daycare van picks them up (most days) from the elementary school and drops them off at the daycare.
It seems Ben has gotten into trouble while riding the bus. He and a few of his little buddies got into an argument with some girls. According to the 'sweetest girl at the daycare' Ben told her that he "was gonna hit her with a rock and kill her family."
I laughed when I heard Lisa telling Mom about it and watched her have a 'talk' with Ben about it. She said, "Ben, Macy said that you told her you were going to hit her with a rock (he framed an explanation on his lips when he heard this part) and kill her family (then got wide-eyed and shocked when she said this)."
He tried to explain but she went into a lecture about not being mean to sweet girls and never threaten to hurt or kill anyone.
Personally I don't believe he threatened to kill her family...because when he and William or Uncle John play soldiers or army or Star Wars or any fighting game, he always insists that the bad guys are wounded...never dead.
And I know a few things about 'sweet nice girls' because I was labeled thus all through my lower education years and I was anything but sweet.
Probably somewhere in the statement a grain of truth begun and as we all know the youngsters can take something and run with it. Ben probably did say some things he shouldn't and I imagine the other kids were putting in their share of it.
After the lecture I said, "Ben next time threaten her with a wet noodle."
My mom and Lisa both jumped on me about it...and I can see their point...any sort of threat isn't a good thing. So I simply said, "Well Ben, since you can't use physical force, play dirty.... tell the girl that if she doesn't be nice to you that you'll marry her when she's older."
That's a more menacing threat that throwing rocks ....lol
It seems Ben has gotten into trouble while riding the bus. He and a few of his little buddies got into an argument with some girls. According to the 'sweetest girl at the daycare' Ben told her that he "was gonna hit her with a rock and kill her family."
I laughed when I heard Lisa telling Mom about it and watched her have a 'talk' with Ben about it. She said, "Ben, Macy said that you told her you were going to hit her with a rock (he framed an explanation on his lips when he heard this part) and kill her family (then got wide-eyed and shocked when she said this)."
He tried to explain but she went into a lecture about not being mean to sweet girls and never threaten to hurt or kill anyone.
Personally I don't believe he threatened to kill her family...because when he and William or Uncle John play soldiers or army or Star Wars or any fighting game, he always insists that the bad guys are wounded...never dead.
And I know a few things about 'sweet nice girls' because I was labeled thus all through my lower education years and I was anything but sweet.
Probably somewhere in the statement a grain of truth begun and as we all know the youngsters can take something and run with it. Ben probably did say some things he shouldn't and I imagine the other kids were putting in their share of it.
After the lecture I said, "Ben next time threaten her with a wet noodle."
My mom and Lisa both jumped on me about it...and I can see their point...any sort of threat isn't a good thing. So I simply said, "Well Ben, since you can't use physical force, play dirty.... tell the girl that if she doesn't be nice to you that you'll marry her when she's older."
That's a more menacing threat that throwing rocks ....lol
Tuesday, March 18, 2008
To the Future...Not the Past...
When I got home yesterday early evening, William and Ben were in the den watching a television show... I think it was ICarly! Anyway, I had my shoes off and Ben who misses little said, "Aunt Sherrie, there's a hole on your toe."
The sock on my right foot had a hole at the big toe. I said, "Oh, it's just trying to escape. It wore through the sock. That's how toes escape, you know."
Ben looked down at his socks--they were holeless. I asked, "Where do you think a toe would go if it could escape off your foot?"
His eyes grew big and he said with 6-year-old enthusiasm, "NEW YORK!"
I laughed, "Is that where you would go if you could escape?"
"NO, I would go to the future so I could play with you, Mommy and Uncle John when you were little."
"The future? But we would be older not younger. You would have to go back to the past to play with us." I smiled to myself. Kids and their confusion on things!
"I CAN"T. I wasn't born then."
Talk about a loss for words! And no matter how I explained that if he could go to the future, he could go to the past---he still held to his idea of "I wasn't born then." I would love to see Bill Cosby handle this one.
The sock on my right foot had a hole at the big toe. I said, "Oh, it's just trying to escape. It wore through the sock. That's how toes escape, you know."
Ben looked down at his socks--they were holeless. I asked, "Where do you think a toe would go if it could escape off your foot?"
His eyes grew big and he said with 6-year-old enthusiasm, "NEW YORK!"
I laughed, "Is that where you would go if you could escape?"
"NO, I would go to the future so I could play with you, Mommy and Uncle John when you were little."
"The future? But we would be older not younger. You would have to go back to the past to play with us." I smiled to myself. Kids and their confusion on things!
"I CAN"T. I wasn't born then."
Talk about a loss for words! And no matter how I explained that if he could go to the future, he could go to the past---he still held to his idea of "I wasn't born then." I would love to see Bill Cosby handle this one.
Tuesday, February 05, 2008
Say.. "Cheese"
Yesterday I was working away at the front desk, logging in orders when Harry a friend of Dad's came by with his 4-yr-old grandson, Cole.
Cole always wants to help me do stuff, so I sent him over to the kids' corner, where I have books and some kids chairs and a table and had him "straighten" it up for me.
Harry and Dad settled down for a long talk... Harry who just had a Colonoscopy was telling Dad about it. I tried to block it out until Cole's little head popped up from the Mickey Mouse book he was looking at and he asked, "What's that Grandpa? Whats a coinopsopy?"
Harry looked uncomfortable. Dad looked amused and I was ever watchful, wondering how he was going to answer this one. Harry looked at me for help and I quickly looked down at my log sheet.
Ole King Cole wasn't going to let it go. "You're not telling meeeeee." He sorta sang it.
"Err..um..er, let's see...the doctor takes a light and a small camera and looks at my colon to see if it's ok."
Cole said, "Where?" He was confused. I think he thought Harry meant a coin. Because he came over and tried to put his little hand in Harry's pocket.
Harry turned 3 shades of red. I think he realized the kid wasn't going to let it drop so he said, "Colon. The Doctor went up my butt hole with a camera and a light and took some pictures."
Cole stood there silent, taking it all in and then said, "Did you smile?"
Cole always wants to help me do stuff, so I sent him over to the kids' corner, where I have books and some kids chairs and a table and had him "straighten" it up for me.
Harry and Dad settled down for a long talk... Harry who just had a Colonoscopy was telling Dad about it. I tried to block it out until Cole's little head popped up from the Mickey Mouse book he was looking at and he asked, "What's that Grandpa? Whats a coinopsopy?"
Harry looked uncomfortable. Dad looked amused and I was ever watchful, wondering how he was going to answer this one. Harry looked at me for help and I quickly looked down at my log sheet.
Ole King Cole wasn't going to let it go. "You're not telling meeeeee." He sorta sang it.
"Err..um..er, let's see...the doctor takes a light and a small camera and looks at my colon to see if it's ok."
Cole said, "Where?" He was confused. I think he thought Harry meant a coin. Because he came over and tried to put his little hand in Harry's pocket.
Harry turned 3 shades of red. I think he realized the kid wasn't going to let it drop so he said, "Colon. The Doctor went up my butt hole with a camera and a light and took some pictures."
Cole stood there silent, taking it all in and then said, "Did you smile?"
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